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"Sorry, honey, Spiderman is in the wash."
"No, you can't wear your swimsuit (or party dress) to school."
"You can't leave the house dressed like that!"
As soon as children are able to make choices, the clothes battle begins. Even children as young as toddlers start to demonstrate self-expression and independence through the clothes and accessories they choose to wear. Much to our dismay, our little ones may insist on wearing their superhero costume for days at a time or even decide to wear their new shoes to bed. School-agers often opt for the trendy and "cool." And "cool" usually translates into expensive, name-brand sneakers, jeans, shirts, and more. Some teens prefer attire that we consider grungy and ill fitting. Whatever the garment, it's not always what we would choose for them.
Why are clothes so important? Clothes and appearance are the most dramatic ways for children to express themselves to others. It is often one of the first choices they are allowed to make. Twos and preschoolers can fall in love with clothes, and clothing becomes increasingly important to children as they get older. Our children want to fit in, be cool, and feel accepted by their peers. In retrospect, many of us may have made some poor clothing choices. (Just take a look back at your old middle school and high school yearbooks.) Clothing choice is also a safe way for children to express normal adolescent stubbornness and rebellion. (In rare situations, clothing may depict clubs or groups of children who may condone violence or sexual conquest. If you question whether your child's clothing represents behavior beyond self-expression, speak to the school's guidance counselor.)
Does it matter what our children wear? The adage, "You can't judge a book by its cover," doesn't ring true when it comes to clothing in our society. Children are judged by their peers and other adults based on the way they dress. And to make the clothes battle even more complicated, what our children's peers find "cool" is often what parents and other adults find inappropriate. Although it doesn't seem fair, the way our children look and dress is often how others judge us, our lifestyle, status, and sometimes our parenting skills. Should we care about what others think about how our children look when they leave the house? Maybe not, but while some of us are just glad to get out of the house on time, most of us do care. When it comes to determining "appropriate clothing," there are several factors to consider: the age of our children, their destination, our budget, and our personal preference. After all, we are the parents and we have the final say, right?
Ref: Bright Horizons e.family news |
